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Repeat after me: I AM SORRY

Monday April 15 2013    |     Views: 3144    |     Comments: 0   |     Print    Bookmark and Share



"A good lasting relationship is one which never holds a grudge and makes good use of every opportunity to make things right. "

Today I want to share with you something that is very important in not just your relationships but our everyday lives. It has nothing to do with gender, age or race; no preference at all. Three words that make extra impact than their actual meaning.
Some of you guys might be wondering what inspired me to write about this, but the truth is something very important did. About a year ago, I lost my mum(God bless and rest her soul) and before I did, we had this big argument. Then I saw all the wrongs in my right and decided to go and apologize. I went and asked her to forgive me. She did. Then I travelled to Port-Harcourt and she died few days later in an accident. Too many questions, too many unsaid words and expressions, but now my point in this shared story is: what if I never apologized and I travelled with anger and hate in me?
One, I will never have gotten a chance to right my wrongs. Two, I will probably never forgive myself for my actions. Three, I will never live past the guilt.
Notice how the word 'never' is used repeatedly in these statements. It just shows how serious it can be. You might just have one opportunity to make everything work, but because of ego and pride you let it all away. A lot of us let pride and ego take the best part of our life that we forget what is and what should be.
For example there are certain men that believe that a woman should always apologize when there is an argument. This school of thought should be corrected because really anyone could be wrong. It takes the bigger person to accept the responsibility and make amends. There are also other people who believe that the benefits of “seniority” include junior ones apologizing to senior ones, even when they are obviously not guilty. All these examples might seem mere to you now but most people actually live by it. “I am older than that Jane girl so why should I apologize first? Am I her mate?” Thoughts like this only make you a big shareholder in Regrets Plc. #teamNOGAINS
I remember my last year in school, my final week precisely. I had a stupid funny argument with my best Friend Jumoke and because of that she didn't appear in any of my Ankara Day pictures. Till today, I look through my album and just wish I walked up to her that day and apologized and took a picture to make us remember that day together. The argument we had was not even worth taking that moment away! Not even close. I can't even remember what we argued about but every look at that album takes me back to that day without her in the pictures. Sadly, pride took all that away and that's only because I let it.
Imagine the case of one of my writers, whose permission I have taken before sharing this. She said she had been keeping malice with her boyfriend for about  two weeks over something she couldn't even remember ,and she had no way to break their silence. She really missed him and had a lot of things she wanted to share. She wished she did otherwise because everything that happened was her fault. She let the opportunity to make it right for a whole two weeks pass by. She was unhappy and disturbed. She could have saved herself this much stress by just simply admitting she was wrong and owning up to it.

Odunayo Dina says,  "The mistake most people make is that they keep waiting for the other person to apologize first because they think if they apologize first, it makes them weak. That's a big misconception. Rather, the one who is the first to offer a handshake of peace is actually showing a deeper and bigger level of maturity."
My dear friends and loved ones, my point in this whole long story is for you to learn how to say you are sorry. Show it in your actions, say it with words, write it, sing it, look it; just make the message clear. Because every extra moment you spend apart for not saying how sorry you are is an extra baggage of regret in the future.
A good lasting relationship is one which never holds a grudge and makes good use of every opportunity to make things right. When you are ready and willing to apologize, you do yourself a favour by first satisfying your conscience, and then transferring the guilt and pressure of your wrong to the other person or persons involved. If I can take a bold step to apologize, it’s up to you to meet me half way and forgive me! As hard as it is to own up to your wrongs, it is easier and mind-relaxing when you do.
Don't forget every added second to life is a blessing! Don't waste it on regrets.
Don't forget to write me on isynwegbu@yahoo.com. Follow us on twitter @wowrelationship and like our page on Facebook: Wow Magazine. We will love to hear from you. Stay blessed and positive.
Have a wonderful month.

Quote for the month!
“I value you and everything we have more than my ego, I'm Sorry.”

 

 

By Isiomah Nwegbu




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